Okay, so today I have made myself a bit of a discovery. Well, to be fair, I have known of this for a while, but it was confirmed to me by a piece of software called ‘unstuck’. My discovery is quite simple, and it is this, my carers do not allow me to have my own self will. This was seem a bit silly, as an idea, at first, but however it makes sense. You see, each individual has their own wants and desires which will transpire into the self-will. As a result, my own will not coordinate with those of my carer, and so, whether they know it or not, they will destroy mine in favour of their own.
Let me give you an example of this. If you really fancy a biscuit, or a piece of chocolate, then the chances are that you will go and get some. Job done. In my case, I have to go and ask, then faced the third degree about why I want it; did I not eat enough? Were the portion sizes too small? Was it cooked wrong? Oh, and of course, did I not know that I should not do that because of the diabetes? So, at the end of the day, the decision is, ultimately, taken away from me.
So, what does this mean when it comes to my writing time? Well, disruption in a word.
I have just had an idea and started writing… Oh, it is time to eat or it is time that I should be in bed. You see, I may not be hungry or tired, but, my carer probably is. In the end, that dictates my life.
It is not just that, but, they will also find me with things to do that are suddenly urgent. This could be as simple as the post arriving, things needing signatures, or me going to look at something. It could be more complicated than that, and involve leaving the house entirely. It all amounts to the same thing, I am not by my computer and writing.
What does that piece of software recommend that I do? Simply, schedule things out, and put my foot down to force the events to take place at the set times. It sounds so simple, but I am not sure that it could really work. I mean, who am I to try and force another person into my schedule?
Any advice is welcome.
7 thoughts on “Self-will”
About writing – so many writers key away when they feel some heavy inspiration, or when they are up against a hard deadline. When they don’t feel the inspiration, or the expectations of others, they just leave it, saying to themselves, “I’ll get back to it when the time is write (or right, I guess). These are the writers you never hear from, because they don’t get all their bad writing out of the way so they can get to their good writing. They treat it like a job, and sit down to it even if nothing comes of it, or they end up deleting the days work.
I used to do anything on days I didn’t “feel it.” I’ve cleaned the catbox – seriously.
Now I go to work every day, which seems so un-artistic, but it is the way for most published writers.
P.S. Told you I was working on a Vonnegut piece.
I don’t get to key away… I am taken from keyboard (and maybe house) by carers who ‘know best’ and son’t check with me first. It’s almost like, ‘Oh, she’s busy… Disturb her NOW!’ Even reading is a pain in the arse and is disturbed by food, drink, post, phone, my ‘need’ for sleep yada yada.
My life is not my own so being published when unable to spend time in day to write seems an impossible dream!
How much time do you spend at work each day? Weekdays or everyday? Got to try to schedule a time to be undisturbed.
At least six hours a day – more if it’s relly going good. I can remember when my job wasn’t writing or teaching writing, and I know what a pain in the arse that can be. A writer friend of mine, Karen Joy Fowler (wrote “The Jane Austin Book Club”, – she optioned the movie rights for $2.5 million, and I do hate her) once told me the best advice she could give any writer was to marry well. I think selling the subsidiary rights for a few million would be a satisfactory move. Oh, yeah…her first book, “Sarah Canary,” was turned down by 33 agents and publishers before being accepted, then being nominated for three writing awards. Imageine that !
10-4… ah, same as my paid job was before I was medically retired… That’s a plan!
It’s a difficult situation. We have tried to weed out the worst offenders, which has helped a lot, but I know my daughter gets really tired of the questions and comments. What happened to people just doing their job?
Not sure but it never happens